We all know that our mental health can be affected by the seasons. I personally feel energized every fall, when the hot and humid summer is finally put to rest. My whole life, I've been adversely affected by winter. When I lived in the south and the winters were mild, it wasn't the cold that got to me. Rather it coincided with bad events in my life: best friend stopped speaking to me, failing exams in math, or simply unrequited love. I also played into my expectations that winter would be a bad time in my life. "Here comes winter. I hope I get through it this time." Now that I live in the north, my mood is directly tied into the weather. By February, early March, I hit a slump and feel endlessly depressed. I can never figure out why, then it hits me: the ceaseless, miserable, overcast, white-out days for months and months have finally gotten to me. A winter with sunshine is something to be treasured. But at least I have the wherewithal to at recognize the signs and avoid playing into seasonal affective disorder. When I feel sad, I can take inventory and recognize that the circumstances of my life are nothing to be sad about, it's simply the weather impact. Sometimes a little self-talk is enough to shake me free, "The weather doesn't make my mood. I can feel the way I want to feel."
Everyone has a favorite season and least favorite season. Maybe it was a time of year when something bad happened in your life (i.e. your parents divorced, you lost your job, a loved one passed away). People who live in overcast areas with little winter sun often buy seasonal lamps called "Happy Lights"to fight the "winter blues." Everyone has heard tale of the increase in suicide attempts in rainy places. Similarly, people with mental illnesses like schizophrenia and bipolar disorder report going through cycles as the seasons change. Sometimes it's linked to allergies, the grass growing in the spring. Sometimes it's linked to colds, the weather dropping in the fall. People say summer are the bad months, and winter are their good months. In Pat's case, when we get to spring we know we can relax. Then as October rolls around, we brace ourselves for the delusional time of year. Pat is medicated, but it doesn't change the cycling during the fall-winter. Ever since his first noncompliance in the winter of 2007, it has happened. He gets hooked on a particular notion and sometimes it grows into a very large problem (confrontations, loss of work, inability to care for himself, not eating). We're lucky if he only glances the surface and the obsession goes away by January. If we're unlucky, he's lost in the fog of his paranoia until Spring.
The Holiday Season is an anxious time of year for our family. Besides the usual arrival of delusional thinking, there's also the fact that Pat doesn't wish people Merry Christmas, buy gifts, appreciate presents given to him, or even clean up for holiday get-togethers (lack of self care is persistent all year). This winter he is convinced that harm will come to his cat. He won't let anyone use the front door because he fears she will get out and never come back. All visitors must call before they arrive so he can let them in through the garage. At first it seemed only a little strange. The cat is 5 or 6 years old and she's very leery of strangers, she's never shown any interest in going outside, and in fact never goes near the front door. But everyone has their own way with their pets. Now Pat has taken to carrying her treats around with him in a baggie in his pocket. He gets angry when someone asks him why. Perhaps he doesn't want to say it out loud or he's just not happy being questioned. He thinks someone will tamper with her treats and poison her. He initially worried an accident would result in the cat getting out and running away, now he is specifically concerned that someone would actually want to kill her. The only person who doesn't like the cat is our father. She scratches furniture, ruined a sofa, and urinates just about anywhere she likes. But Pat hasn't said that he thinks Dad is the one intent on hurting the cat, it's only implied. There have been delusions before where Pat thought Dad was somehow colluding or conspiring with others to make a mockery of him, hurt his reputation, etc. An interesting factor here is that Dad is the caregiver who has the most trouble communicating with Pat. They can't meet each other halfway.
I guess this brings me to an important point for caregivers: You cannot manage other people's relationships for them. Obviously their communication needs mending, care and consideration, but there is no way to motivate other people to make room for each other's eccentricities.
All I can do is listen and take into consideration the winter delusions, maintain the open mind, remain calm and don't overreact to the ground shifting under our feet. Happy Holidays!
Everyone has a favorite season and least favorite season. Maybe it was a time of year when something bad happened in your life (i.e. your parents divorced, you lost your job, a loved one passed away). People who live in overcast areas with little winter sun often buy seasonal lamps called "Happy Lights"to fight the "winter blues." Everyone has heard tale of the increase in suicide attempts in rainy places. Similarly, people with mental illnesses like schizophrenia and bipolar disorder report going through cycles as the seasons change. Sometimes it's linked to allergies, the grass growing in the spring. Sometimes it's linked to colds, the weather dropping in the fall. People say summer are the bad months, and winter are their good months. In Pat's case, when we get to spring we know we can relax. Then as October rolls around, we brace ourselves for the delusional time of year. Pat is medicated, but it doesn't change the cycling during the fall-winter. Ever since his first noncompliance in the winter of 2007, it has happened. He gets hooked on a particular notion and sometimes it grows into a very large problem (confrontations, loss of work, inability to care for himself, not eating). We're lucky if he only glances the surface and the obsession goes away by January. If we're unlucky, he's lost in the fog of his paranoia until Spring.
The Holiday Season is an anxious time of year for our family. Besides the usual arrival of delusional thinking, there's also the fact that Pat doesn't wish people Merry Christmas, buy gifts, appreciate presents given to him, or even clean up for holiday get-togethers (lack of self care is persistent all year). This winter he is convinced that harm will come to his cat. He won't let anyone use the front door because he fears she will get out and never come back. All visitors must call before they arrive so he can let them in through the garage. At first it seemed only a little strange. The cat is 5 or 6 years old and she's very leery of strangers, she's never shown any interest in going outside, and in fact never goes near the front door. But everyone has their own way with their pets. Now Pat has taken to carrying her treats around with him in a baggie in his pocket. He gets angry when someone asks him why. Perhaps he doesn't want to say it out loud or he's just not happy being questioned. He thinks someone will tamper with her treats and poison her. He initially worried an accident would result in the cat getting out and running away, now he is specifically concerned that someone would actually want to kill her. The only person who doesn't like the cat is our father. She scratches furniture, ruined a sofa, and urinates just about anywhere she likes. But Pat hasn't said that he thinks Dad is the one intent on hurting the cat, it's only implied. There have been delusions before where Pat thought Dad was somehow colluding or conspiring with others to make a mockery of him, hurt his reputation, etc. An interesting factor here is that Dad is the caregiver who has the most trouble communicating with Pat. They can't meet each other halfway.
I don't know what to say. He doesn't seem interested in anything I talk about. It's a waste of time. He doesn't want to talk to me.
I guess this brings me to an important point for caregivers: You cannot manage other people's relationships for them. Obviously their communication needs mending, care and consideration, but there is no way to motivate other people to make room for each other's eccentricities.
All I can do is listen and take into consideration the winter delusions, maintain the open mind, remain calm and don't overreact to the ground shifting under our feet. Happy Holidays!
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